Just a little CONSerned

Common Sense & Family Matters

Today’s Youth- Punks and Lazy Adults?

When I was your age I had to walk a mile in the snow uphill just to get to school. That or something like that is usually said to a youngster who is complaining about having to do something. Laziness is inherit in youth who think they have to do nothing but eat, sleep, and play, all at the expense and effort of someone else providing them the means or opportunity to do so. At what point does childhood transcend into adulthood? When does a child become responsible for their own actions? When do you sanction or take away privileges for punishment or teaching? Is taking away the PC, XBOX, or their allowance appropriate for a teen who refuses to do chores, or talking back, or being disrespectful. And talking back is different today then it was when I was a youth. If I ever told my parents to F*** off or “do it yourself” I’d have a hard time sitting down for a week, while doing double the chores I had to do in the first place. Today, getting a teen to even clean up after themselves without being told is a nightmare, let alone asking them to do something on top of that.

An added complication is the lack of appropriate consequences for bad behavior. Oh dear, even that last sentence is full of politically correct jargon — education is full of it. I know that’s the same in most areas of modern life — full of messages that are soft on truth — full of euphemisms… So, what should the sentence say? Bad behavior should be punished… now, that really is controversial! Maybe then behavior would actually improve, and families could live with peace of mind, without being tormented by thugs — or if behavior was unacceptable then something would actually be done about it (punishment?) rather than excuses being made and nothing done. courtesy of ezinearticles.com

This is not an issue affecting just my kids, or yours, but rather youth around the world. I am probably luckier than most. My kids don’t do drugs, don’t get involved with the “bad crowd”, and they bring home decent grades. I am thankful for that. But the bigger picture bothers me, and what I read in the news every day. When did kids start to think they could get away with acting this way. Did it start when teachers were told they can no longer discipline our kids at school? Did it start when we were told that spanking is a big no-no and we could be damaging our kids for life? I don’t know about you but the occasional smack on the back side to stop them from sticking the fork in the electrical outlet for the umpteenth time is hardly aimed at damaging them for life. Just trying to ensure that they stop doing what they are doing so they can HAVE a life. Or taking away the XBOX for not doing chores, that (in my opinion) is preparing them for the workforce and teaching some sort of work ethic. These are just  examples, but the cause and effect holds true in most cases. We could look at the statistics here, and here, and here. But they are misleading.

Depending on where you look and what result you are searching for you could come up with the conclusion that youth crime rate is down, but is it really? Or has it just changed? Do kids get punished as much as they used to? Does it get reported as often? Unless it is violent in nature then it is hardly worth the time of anyone doing anything about it. When I was a kid stealing a pack of gum from the store resulted in a ride home in the back of a squad car and corporal punishment dished out by my father, who had no qualms about making me see the err of my ways at the end of a belt. Did that damage me for life? No, but I sure as hell never stole another pack of gum. Today’s youth are looking at quite a different scenario. Was the kid hungry? Why did he do it? Was it the parents fault for not teaching them right from wrong? Is there problems in the home? Maybe CAS should get involved. It’s ridiculous. Maybe, just maybe. The kid just wanted gum and didn’t want to pay for it. So instead of dealing with the main issue at hand all sorts of other things come in to play needlessly diverting the attention off the child to someone else. And leaving the child with the opinion that what they did was wrong, apparently, but nothing in the form as “punishment” was experienced so hey, it wasn’t so bad, and the chances of it happening again are greater. Also, the store owner or clerk are less likely to even report it because they know that nothing is going to happen. Except, the kid is going to be pissed off for causing it all and create bigger problems, in the form of vandalism and harassment.

Today’s youth have a sense of entitlement that I do not understand. They have no respect for their parents, or authority.  And this is a direct result from Society changing its views on how to deal with bad behavior. First it was the Young Offenders Act, which was changed in 2003 to the Youth Criminal Justice Act. Under the YOA the maximum sentence for killing another person was 3 years. And under the YCJA it is now 5 years. Could this be part of the problem? Do you think the kids don’t know this?

Repeat offenses by youth are on the rise, and this is just the ones that get reported. Take this case for example. A 15 yr old teen that killed a man while driving a stolen car will spend no more that 1 year in jail. Let me say that again NO MORE THAN ONE YEAR IN JAIL.

He was charged with dangerous driving causing death while fleeing from police, failing to stop and possession of a stolen vehicle.

If an “adult” was charged with the same offenses then what would you guess the punishment to be, minimum 10 yrs to a maximum of life in prison. This kid killed a man, took his life, and will spend less time in jail then I would for not paying traffic fines. And this was not his first offense, no, try his third. And yet I am being told that this is for the benefit of the youth for counseling and rehabilitation. I don’t see the word punishment, or atonement. What is the impression of the Justice system this kid is going to have now? What about his friends? Other youths that are already having brushes with the law younger than 15. They are being taught that they can get away with murder.

Yes it is a depressing thought to see a youth wind up in jail for 10 years. How depressing is it for the family of the man he killed? What kind of message is Society sending when taking another human being’s life only warrants 12 months in jail because a certain amount of birthday’s hasn’t been reached yet. I’ve heard teens say “I could do 12 months standing on my head”. Does that sound like a person that is going to learn a lesson? Or does that sound like a person that things he is getting away with it, and most likely going to re-offend. Gang rapes, lighting kids on fire, swarmings, beatings, murder. I don’t recall these types of crimes being committed by kids when I was younger. Is it the video games, TV, or Society getting weaker in dealing with it.

It’s time that politicians stayed out of parenting, and concentrated on what we elect them to do. We don’t need them to tell us not to smoke, or where we can park our cars. We don’t need them to charge us for composting, or delivering mail to our door. But we do need them to use OUR TAX DOLLARS responsibly. It’s time that our laws reflect our morals.

February 18, 2010, 11:08 AM - Posted by | All News

6 Comments »

  1. I might sound like Tipper Gore but the lifestyle image of hip hop rapper thugs is most disturbing. I recently attended my nephew’s high school basketball game, the pregame warm-ups were accompanied with rap music it’s lyrics were promoting use of violence through guns plus violence and hatred towards all
    Yes, we had songs of drugs and protests but never did we advocate hatred and violence when I was his age.
    All the players emulated the thug NBA player, high school students with tattoos.Unbelievable!

    Comment by Simeon | February 18, 2010, 12:15 PM | Reply

  2. Ive noticed the “downward” trend also.I stay in contact with the generation behind me so i get kept up to speed about what the current trends and lifestyles are today.My friends are on a very short list.They include at least one member from the generation ahead of me,mine, and the one behind me.Its proved to be priceless in life’s calculations.
    Just be prepared to argue constructively,and we should be ok.

    Comment by Joshua | February 18, 2010, 3:31 PM | Reply

  3. I think some of the issues with today’s kids are the fact they are “friends” with the parents of today … some even partying with parents(esp.single ones),maybe the acceptance of the changing times,changed family values.
    When I was young,we were not allowed in ADULTS conversations,having to leave the room,when company came,NO KIDS were allowed,my parents,played cards and had adult conversation,WITHOUT having to watch language,BECAUSE,KIDS WERE NOT INCLUDED! Out of RESPECT WE NEVER,BACKTALKED,the RULES were the RULES and we didn’t question them.
    Kids today don’t have such STRICT RULES and LACK RESPECT,instead they are encouraged to voice their opinions,not many teenagers make alot of sense when it comes to RULES. Also,now kids have all these “rights”to notify CPS,if they smacked for disobeying,WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?? I never hit my kids,I just didn’t,BUT I GOT MY SPANKINGS too numerous to count! and they all had to do with respect issues,the lack thereof! HA! I was a pistol!

    Comment by Terisa | February 19, 2010, 5:37 PM | Reply

  4. I enjoyed this article. Thank you for writing it. John D. Rockefeller once said, “I believe every right implies a responsibility; every opportunity, an obligation; every possession, a duty.” If someone demands they have a right to drive a vehicle just because they turn 16, they must also demonstrate a level of responsibility equal to and deserving of that right. If they do not, well, that right should no longer be available to them but removed. What seems to be growing more and more in our society is a lack of demand for responsibility and only the emphasis on a person demanding their rights. How unfortunate.

    Comment by Steve Barnes | May 7, 2011, 1:28 PM | Reply

    • I agree it is sad how things have changed. By the way where did you see this? I’m curious this was written a while ago.

      Comment by Beast | May 7, 2011, 1:31 PM | Reply

  5. I totally agree. I believe that this laziness and do nothing attitude relates to the changing of discipline in the home and school. Kids used to respect their parents because they knew they would get spanked and also because of that they didn’t want to disappoint their parents. Now because most people don’t punish their children properly and let them get away with most things because they think they are protecting them, the kids are not leaning good hard work or discipline. When they grow up they will not understand that actions have consequences and the sense of being responsible. I understand from my own experience that my boyfriend does not disipline his 12 year old son and he does not listen to us, he thinks he can do things whenever he wants to and not when we tell him to. It is like pulling teeth to get him to do any chores if he does any. He just moved in with us and I don’t think his mom ever made him do chores or disiplined him much. He made the comment to us that his mom treated him like his age and we treated him like a child. We commented back that being your age means you need to be responsible to do what we ask when we ask the first time, and be responsible to clean up behind yourself. His dad has let a lot of things go unpunished because he doesn’t want to hurt his feelings. I have tried to tell him that if he doesn’t get punished then he will think he can get away with anything, like he has been doing. Now after he has lived with us for almost a year his dad is starting to be firmer with him because he gets so fed up with asking him to do something or we will have talks about what is expected of him and it seems like it is in one ear and out the other, because he never does anything we talk about or ask him to do. He is very stubborn and has a slite temper(he gets from his mom), and gets mad when we tell him somthing and it is not what he wants. this have been a very trying year understanding a teenager and learning how to deal with him, when he is not used to our ways of doing things. I have noticed that the kids are so lazy now they are abbreviating words a lot more (maybe because of texting) I’ve even noticed that street signs and such are being abbreviated also. Why is everyone so lazy now? What happened to good old fashion hard work, which is how we got where we are today? None of the kids today understand how to work to earn a dollar. I tell my 12 year old when he wants money for something that he needs to work for it or save his money and he doesn’t know how or refuses to do either he just expects us to give it to him.

    Comment by Kat | August 29, 2012, 4:29 PM | Reply


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